My husband didn't buy me a Mother's Day gift. Am I wrong for being upset?

MLL84	I feel your pain. Yesterday was my first mothers day as well and my husband didn't do anything for me. He used the excuse that his father never did anything for his mom, but that doesn't make it right. There are lots of things my mom did and didn't do when I was a child and I don't repeat that behavior and use her as a cop out. I didn't even care about a gift. A piece of paper with "mommy I love you" would have been sufficient. Our son is 11 months old and until he is old enough to make me a card himself I would think a father could be thoughtful enough to get one for his son and try his best to show the appreciation his child would show if he could. Instead I got a big fat thoughtless nothing. It is a mothers day I will never forget. I just hope he hasn't got his hopes up for fathers day because he will be receiving the same heart felt nothing that I got!!!!!!!!!!

Yesenia B	I know how you are feeling..I have been in tears all day..I have 2 sons and I live my life for my family..my husband did not get me anything my dad cooked me dinner. I always get my husband something special for any ocassion and make him feel special. We have been together for 13 years and he keeps pulling this crap..I did not get anything for valentines, christmas b-day etc...i am fed up...

TotallyUnderstand	I agree with you 100%. I experienced the same exact thing yesterday and I was hurt as well. I more angry about it now instead of sad.

Emani's Mom	Well at least you got lunch. This is my first mothers day and All my husband did was sit on the couch and watch my clean up. I didn't even get told happy mothers day nor did he offer to help me. So please be thankful for the little things he does, some of us have it worse than you

Sashi Aravinth	no you are not...i am in the same boat...i knew if i came on the internet i will find someone like me who is hurt...i have a three year old and a 9 month old...i checked my email so many times yesterday and nothing...not even an online card...i just started to cry now b/c it hurts...i know how you feel...what to do, just think atleast we have kids to be a mom right...thats good enough...i guess.

Little Red	I don't blame you for feeling hurt. He should have given you something for your first mothers day... you gave him a son! Don't sell him short on fathers day though. Show him how its done!

Tristan C	Last year was my first Mother's Day and I didn't get anything from my husband. This year he didn't do anything either. He was thinking of you though. He might not have done it the way you wanted him to do it but he did something. That has to count for something. I know exactly how you are feeling but he did try. You can't be wrong with feeling upset if it is a feeling you are having. You should talk about it though. Tell him exactly what you told us, let him know that you were expecting a gift. Don't be ashamed of how you felt or feel. Your husband sounds like a descent man, I would cut him a little slack. Take a deep breathe and talk to him.

zero tolerance	u re so shallow and not smart. he acknowledged mother's day - he took u to a restaurant. u didn't want lunch - should have told him u want dinner instead. u re so yeeewwww.

Romey	hon, Father's Day is around the corner....tee hee...your a woman, I am sure you know what pay-it-forward is.

Joyous	Yes, you are being WAAAAY too sensitive. You are not HIS mother, so men often need some advance notice of what you are expecting. Give him the benefit of the doubt, and let him know in advance if you need or want him to do something that will make you happy. At this point, think about what he can do that will make you feel better, and let him know. Be NICE. Men are often more motivated to make you happy if you make them happy in return. It's called "positive reinforcement."

deeterluvscj	I suspect you're a newly wed. These same kind of things got me down when I was. My husband always forgot me on special occasions. As time goes by you will realize there is more to marriage than petty material things like this. A gift would have been a nice gesture, sure, but I think your husband taking you to your favorite restraunt was his way of acknowledging Mother's day. He may not have known what to get you in the way of a gift,some men have trouble in this area.

Bunny318	Happy Mother's Day! First of all, to enlighten you, men don't know the protocol in occasions or events that are meaningful to us women. There are even men who don't give flowers or gifts on Valentines Day. Its not just in their DNA. It doesn't mean you are loved less. The mere fact that he took you ought for lunch is something. We cannot dictate how we are loved. We cannot tell our husbands to love us in a certain way. You may be expecting dinner, romance and all of it but I hope you appreciate your husband's lunch effort. You are loved. You are loved in the way your husband loves you.

Vitiran	All that happened was that your expectations were not met. Here's a question for you... did you let your husband know what your expectations were before Mother's Day? Did you tell him that you wanted a gift? Did you tell him you wanted your first Mother's Day to be memorable for a lifetime? Even the best husband in the world is not a mind-reader. Though he may have not been totally on the ball and communicating well as to what kind of Mother's Day you wanted, YOU were the one that didn't communicate your expectations. Sorry, but you're just as responsible (if not more so) for the outcome. I'm sure you're husband loves you and desperately wants to see you pleased, so why don't you give both of you a break and continue your Mother's Day for the rest of week and into next weekend. Doesn't that sound like a extra-special Mother's Day. Who says Mother's Day only has to be one day? But this time, let him know what you're expecting so he can do his part. Good luck and congrats on your new born.

Dama Kable	He took you to lunch, so he remembered the day, didn't he? He knew what was up and did what he thought was right. Why isn't that enough for you? Were you going to lavish him with gifts this Father's day? Maybe he didn't want to break the bank. Can't you work it out together? Gifts aren't as special if they're not a surprise... if you start expecting surprises you're bound to be disappointed. But if you want something it's better to talk it over than repress your feelings. Work out which holidays require gifts, what's acceptable etc. but I think you're looking a gift horse in the mouth here. The grass is always greener and so on. Set aside your ego and enjoy the life you have.

.	well, don't feel bad. all I got was a 6 pack of cupcakes that were $2.99 from a grocery store bakery and an unsigned card that is still at this very moment in a shopping bag on top of the refrigerator. think I should just read it and return it to the store? :(

bubbs	I know sweetie, your first Mothers Day was a big deal to you. My husband never got me anything on mothers day, but my daughters did, once they were old enough to shop themselves. While I feel a man should give the mother of his child(ren) a gift, some feel it is only for their own mothers. On the other hand, he did take you to lunch, which is more than my husband ever did for me on Mothers Day. Also, I believe he honestly had no idea he should've gotten you anything for Mothers Day. He didn't mean to hurt your feelings. So please try to let it go and enjoy the rest of your day.

giggles677	Ok as a woman I think it is crazy that some men just don't get the fact that they should get the mother of their children something for Mother's Day. But he did take you out for a nice lunch so be grateful for that. WHY... read on! LOL! Now for the men in my life.. fiancee, father, brother & grandfather... They all believe that since the women in their life are not their mothers there is no reason for them to do anything or give anything to their significant others on this day. My father always made sure we had a bit of money so we could do something for our mother but never bought my mother anything for mothers day. Same with my brother and grandfather. My fiancee and I do not have kids but from what I hear he was the same way with his ex. And let me tell you my fiancee is one of the most romantic and thougthful people but he stands firm on "She is not my mother" theory. He said the Valentine's Day is the day he celebrates me and everything I am to him including the mother of his children when that day comes. Sweet but still kinda of a cop out in my eyes. Men are men though!

tincan62	sure

Ana	No, he is not wrong. You know what? I hate the idea of "Mothers' Day", "Fathers' Day" , "Hand-washing Day" and all the other days. I thank my mother for everything that she has done for me on her birthday. If he had forgotten your birthday, then it is an issue. But not this.

jessica	I understand that you would expect a gift ESPECIALLY since it's your first mother's day. However, he did take you out so he acknowledged the special day and that is better than nothing. You have a right to be hurt, but only a little. To get overworked about it is silly unless you believe he chose not to give you a gift as a malicious act and he actually knew you wanted one. Otherwise, live and learn. Hint at it next year, people are forgetful. Congrats on motherhood!

only in holguin	don't get so upset about it im male and sometimes we do not think, ita a hard transformation to be a parent , im sure he will remember in the future

Micah M	You are not his mother though, yell at your 3 month old son for not getting you anything. All seriousness, why would you expect a gift from him? He could have bought something and said it was from your son, but does that really mean anything to you? The time spent during the lunch was probably better then any gift he would have bought you. Time together is money well spent in my opinion. I might be wrong myself though, but a perspective from a guy.

Whitnae	its a different sort of holiday for everyone. some people take it more seriously than others. You, like me, come from a family where Mother's day is like a second birthday for women. Its a day people make us feel special and loved. Your husband may come from a different background. Just discuss it further with him. Lay it out how you two will celebrate Mother's and Father's day from now on. Talking about it is the best way to go though.

joser021490	I think that he did the right thing by recognizing that it was mothers day and taking you out for a nice lunch. But, after all I think that an item is just an item if you wanted something.

Joe F	Maybe they didn't make a big deal out of it at his home growing up? Also maybe he was under the impression you are supposed to get things on Mother's day for YOUR mother not for your wife? That is another way of looking at it.However I can see a guy getting something for the mother of his children. He at least took you to lunch hon, so he made some effort the best he knew to do.Give him a little credit.

MOTO_MOTO	that was wrong of him..hows a three month old gonna buy his momma something?that's his job until they are old enough to do it themselves.

lolly	He took you to lunch. WHat is wrong with that? Be thankful he did anything for you at all. You sound very selfish. He DID do something for you,a nd you aren't even acknowledging it. I think that is very inconsiderate. He acknowledged the day, and he acknowledged you, you shouldn't expect anything more than that.

*LyndseyBugg<3	Awww..No it's not wrong for you to be upset at all! It was very important to you...I'd be upset too. Especially since it was your first Mother's Day!