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My husband divorced me, but I still love him. Can you give me advice?
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My husband divorced me, but I still love him. Can you give me advice?

I can't get over him. I can't date or really function to my full capacity. What type of counseling should I seek and is there a chance to get him back? We haven't talked for 4 months.







aru
show your love the way ur husband likes


feedman214
Rating
Get on with your life. Make it with his best friend and he'll be back>


smurfette_au2000
See a counsellor. Possibly a grief one. The end of a relationship can be like a death, and the emotional effects can be the same. Based upon the fact that he's divorced you and won't speak to you, I would say with 99% certainty, that there is no chance of a reconciliation in the near future. You'll be ok without him. You just need to believe that you can be self sufficient, and that your life has just as much meaning without him, as it did with him. In time you will heal. Just force yourself to do things. Go for a walk, go to the gym, read a book, go on a weekend away with a friend. Go to the gym and just run on the treadmill. Use your grief to get yourself fit. Exercising increases your endorphin levels, which makes you happier, and will therefore help you to move on. You'll be ok. Rely on your friends and family for support. Talk to someone close to you about how you feel, if you don't want to talk to a stranger (counsellor). In time, you'll find someone who'll love you as much as you love them, and you'll wonder why you ever wanted your ex back. Big cuddle from me. Try to smile. You'll get through it.


strawberry.shortcake
Rating
Move on.


tom cruise
talk to him and tell him how you love him. just admit that you have lost to him,like me,and hug him, making sure he comforts you


ghyunu
Rating
I think there is no chance to have him back. For a while, don't date since you can't... But you must find other activities to keep you busy and prevent from thinking of him. And the oblivion will come slowly...


Dark Birch
Rating
Really, just get over him, missing him isn't gonna help or anything.


pencilnbrush
most of all......if you two got back together.... would one of you feel like it was wasting time?. i know its harse. but, time is something you never get back. i wasted alot of it waiting for others. life is a short thing... live it. you cant go forward by looking backwards
good luck


Jess
Rating
You have to understand why you two split up in the first place. Is it coz the both of you were fustrated with one another's problems or something like affairs? Once you estabished that, you might want to get to know him better. Since the both of you married, both of you must have loved each other once. Get to the root of why you both divorced. And try to solve that. But of course, it's always important to know the opinions of your ex. Send him something subtle. Like a long email that tells him your feelings about this and see how he responds? Hope that helps. If it doesn't, feel free to drop me a mail.


scatz
Get out with your friends as regularly as you can. This will take your mind off of him and you never know, you might even meet someone else.

You 'will' get over it.


ramziens786
May be your husbend love someone els, though you love him.
Remember if you realy loveble you must realy get it in return as above so below.
So find someone who realy loves you than you chase behind someone whom do you love. You will be more happy throughout your life.

God bless you.


Leb Sista
How can you still love someone that rejected you? Sorry but I cant stand it when someone talk likes this, you've survived before you met him, so why cant you survive and function without him now? We women must stop lowering and grovelling ourselves for men, wheres your Independence? And yes it would help a lot if you talk to someone professional about it, but the key here is 'time' you cant expect yourself to forget him that quickly. Don't worry in a few months you'll look back and wonder why you needed him so much. I know its better said than done but don't cry over someone that deliberately caused those tears in the first place. Love yourself...Love your life...Embrace it.


rayhanna
Rating
1) the guy's having a nice and sweet life without you, f*ing somebody else right now, not thinking about you

2) is he worth remembering? i think not, if he divorced you. f* him

3) you're wasting your time, energy and life and that is really not worthy of you

you don't need counseling. all you gotta do is burn and destroy all your memories with the guy, erase him from your life, convert to islam and maybe get another husband.


China Guru
Rating
Takes two to tango sweetie!


runner45
Rating
Being honest with yourself is the best thing you can do for yourelf. It sounds like you have some issues of codependency,and as a result of that, there has been some unhealthy interaction between you and him. Search out codependency; it will help you.


average_guy_1271970
Rating
I really feel for you. "Till death do you part" still means something to some of us.

Honestly, I'd say you should give yourself time. You are grieving something that you put your entire self into, and it's normal for it to take a long time to get over. People who just bounce back from a divorce aren't being honest with themselves or the people they are dating. What you're feeling is what you are supposed to be feeling.

I believe the best way to get over grief it to talk to God about it. God cares, and He finds ways to help. As far as counselling - I think it's all B.S. They'll encourage you to look for peace within yourself - peace comes from God. I'd encourage you to become active in a church. It'll help you get closer to God, you'll meet new people, and it'll get your mind off missing your ex.

You'll get over it, and you'll find happiness again.


bkrboyz
Rating
go out have a little wine ,nice big order of "tube steak smothered in shorts".and get on with your life


longneck242002
Always chance to get him back. Depends why he divorced you.
Need patience. Try finding someone else in the mean time.
Counseling good. Mental Counseling.


shiva_swar
Rating
Send him a photo two of you. Are you really interests in him? If he does not hate you then it is possible to regain him. There are spiritual ways to regain him. Are you ready for it?


strangeanswerer
Very serious and sad experience. My sister in law overcame something similar by taking a very challenging profesionnal step forward, she applied for an international project. She succeeded and moved to another country. I do not know if all wounds are healed, but she is a successful professionnal with happy couple life so maybe it works.
Anyway, as far as i know you should try something new. Be it job, town, house or hobby. No man will be able to fill someone else's place, no man will resist competition weith an ex idol and frankly, no man you care about deserve such a fate. So first of all try to get balanced with yourself, and next you can start dating. You need time for yourself, your mother, sister, old friend or whatever, it is like a wound, who eve would come now into your life would make you feel hurt by comparison.
If you can afford it, try travelling. Maybe even on business trip or selling something, give a try.
I wish you good luck.
You are a strong person and do not need that idiot into your life anymore. Do not think about getting him back.


WC
Rating
If your husband has fallen out of love with you, there isn't much of anything you can do about it. Unrequited love is most painful. There isn't anyone of us who haven't felt it at least once in their lifetime. It will continue to happen as long as we live. What I did was to accept it, and with the passage of time, it gets easier to move on to other more fruitful relationships. Give it as much time as you need to sort things out, but don't cling to something that may not be achievable.The best of luck to you.







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