My husband is 40 and his best buddy is 19?? Is that normal????

katydid	I don't think this is a healthy relationship. Your husband should ALWAYS put you and the children in front of his "friend". What I'm curious about is, why was a 30 year old hanging out with a 9 year old? I would tell my husband to either start treating you with respect or leave with his friend. And I would tell the friend that he MUST treat you with respect (although that will be hard since your husband doesn't). Your husband isn't acting his age. He needs to grow up but he won't until he gets some counseling or an ultimatum. He needs something to help him. Take care of yourself and whatever you do, make sure he doesn't treat you this way in front of your children. One more thing. Isn't it illegal for a 19 y.o. to be drinking? It is in most states. Your husband could be prosecuted for contributing to the delinquency of a minor. You have your hands full. Take care of your kids and yourself first. Your husband is acting like a turd.

beautiful naomi	It's not usual for 40 year old married man to have a 19 year old friend that's his best buddy . So you should ask him whats going on. I think that his friend is telling him to be mean to because he doesn't like you. I also think he is up to something. You should sit down and talk with your husband and tell him that his friend needs to move out and he needs to stop hanging around him. I hope I helped. I hope everything works out.

Evil Genius Dude	I have to agree that it's not normal. It might be innocent, or it might not be. But it's not normal.

Pebbles B	Oh yeah that is kind of strange!! There maybe an affair between the two of them I don't know maybe there might be something going on they might have a relationship and even if they don't why would a 40 year old man hang out with a 19 year old? Now that really doesn't make any since at all!!!! He shouldn't be living in your house either!!!!

the_ivy_vine	Okay, you know that's not a healthy relationship...esp. if it has the pattern it does. However, if you're looking for validation, you got it! I think that it's not necessarily a bad thing for a 40 yr old to hang out with someone half his age. It IS bad if he's starting to ACT like someone half his age. Esp. at the expense of his wife and kids. You should consider talking to your husband and putting this kid out. He's not 19 anymore. He's got a family, responsibilities, and he should be the one rubbing of on the kid, not the other way around. Doesn't he feel the least bit ridiculous? I can't imagine it does much for his manhood to be like a 19 year old. He should be more concerned with being his kids' hero and not the hero of some dumb teenager who clearly has no class. Maybe your husband is going through a "midlife crisis" a few years early or something.

wrfine	i don't think he's gay. he just like feeling young again the best thing to do would be to get rid of the youngster and wait for the old man to get over it and hopefully your life will continue on?

Switch	Your husband sounds gay!

riot_boi	It sounds like your husband likes kids he sounds like a nice guy =)

J	This is surely not alright if this kid is now living in your home. It's only a matter of time until there's some kind of blow up if it isn't snuffed now.

Kit Kat	Something isnt right...........maybe even there is a relationship going on between them............sorry, reality bites.

fuzzykitty	No, it sounds like a gay relationship to me.Also the drinking age is 21.

benz s55	It definitely isn't normal for a 40 year old guy to be hanging out with someone that is 20 years younger than they are. What could they possibly be able to relate to on the same level about? 40 year old is married with a family and kids. 19 year old is single and freeloading off of someone. I would be concerned.

Tiki-Man Jenkins	is it a ps3 cuz then its not normal if just regular ur fine.

Violet Pearl	Sounds like your husband has a new boyfriend.

logan28	No. Your husband is trying to act like he is still a teenager. Not that it is wrong, but the way he is treating you is uncalled for. He needs to grow up and get new friends.

Odessa R	seems to me your husband needs to grow up and take care of his family . doesn't seem healthy to me by far , where is this kids family ? something seems out of whack for sure !! maybe you should keep a closer eye on whats going on and another thing this kid needs to move out like Yesterday !!

Chaos	you must be careful. Maybe your husband is gey or pedophile, or maybe not. Maybe that`s just normal friend-relationship. If you and your husband have not children....maybe is that??..

vicki_pants!	They are lovers and it is very un-natural. I wouldn't tolerate it in my house in front of my kids.

Shy Girl S	Sounds to me like they are lovers. Also, no it's not normal because of the way he treats you. He seems to get off by putting you down and embarrassing you...sad, sad man.

Mr. Taco	Well, it is not necessarily ABnormal in itself, but the way the relationship is unfolding suggests that there is a problem. For one thing, that boy is underage to be drinking beer. If you are in the United States, your husband is breaking the law. (If not, then nevermind!) In any case, the 19-year-old is irrelevant. Anything that results in a man ignoring his own children, acting mean to everyone, or making nasty comments is unhealthy. You need to discuss this behavior with him and let him know how it makes you feel and tell him that it has to stop. If that doesn't work, then you should suggest marriage counseling. If he won't go, then go yourself. If THAT doesn't work, I'd be calling my attorney if I were you. Put your foot down on this before it gets worse! You and your children do not deserve to be treated this way. Good luck!

winterpixie_13	My guess would be that your husband is going through is mid-life crisis. I don't know if it's healthy, but doesn't sound like it. I wish I could better advice. Other than hitting up side the head really hard and saying " Look you are 40 yrs old, you have a wife and kids that love you. And if you don't grow and start being the man I married. And appreciate the thing that you do have they will be gone. And for your sake I hope that 19yr old can cook, and is better in bed than me because if this keeps up I will not be here for you anymore. I will Leave. I will not watch you self destruct. And I will not let take our kids down with you!!!!!!!" Maybe then he will listen?

Richard	It's not normal and it's not healthy and it is certainly not acceptable in a marriage. I might even suspect they are having a gay affair. Sorry.

Lady in Red	Mid-life crisis. He wants to be a teenager again with no responsibility and no sense of respect.

The kid who did.	Ahh! he had a threesome and its getting to his head! He likes the sausages more the the donuts.

sourgirl	what the hell? ur husband thinks he can be a kid again, hanging out with this guy. And yes that other kid is feeding him. its okay to hang out once in a while, but never when it means ignore ur kids

'Pimp SugaWater'	Sounds like your husband is trying to be 19 again. Maybe his friend makes him think of the good ol' days when he was his age. As far as the strange acting between the two of them, don't know what that's about. I won't accuse him of being gay just yet, they probably took a couple of chicks to a hotel when they were out drinking that night and he felt guilty about it. What video games do they play? If they play Madden or Fight Night they most likley aren't gay. If they're playing a Barbie game then........ It is wrong that he's treating his family like that, whatever it is.