My husband lied to me about major issues what should I do?

olitorago	I think the most intelligent answer is to dump him, still you should be thinking about issues like love, the biological father of your son, etc, valuate your situation, try to mix heart things with brain things.

Mercedes_82	If you love him, try to work thru it...otherwise you have the perfect grounds for an anullment. Best of luck.

Shannon V	you two need to go get some counseling together and separate. i'm sure your trust in him is totally shattered and with good reason your husband sounds like a very immature insecure man who needs to grow up and face what he has done to you!!!! these are ones that give men not all a bad name

prettipoisonme	the term that renee zellweger used was anullment or divorce by means to an end by fraud or marriage by lying and presenting a fraudulent way to a marriage contract. you prove this, you get the divorce im sure.if thats what you want...

scarlettboca	Did you fall in love with him or the degree? Love is not about how many degrees you have. You have a lot to learn. The child with another woman that you didn't know about -- now THAT IS the bigger issue. Your priorities are screwy if not immature or snooty. Grow up. Marriage isn't for sissies.

cowboy	trust is ever thing you need to start over with him and he will have to get right with you and maybe you can make it!!! divorce is the last thing !!!!!

Cathy G	Don't be torn- just get out. He has violated your trust and , if he lies about one thing, he'll lie about more. You can't even say that you love him, because you're not even sure who he is.

guywhobrokeyourglassesin4thgrade	if its bothering you that much then leave him. the part that yur highly educated and he aint will just bring up more problems in the future. and you wouldnt really ask the question if you really really love him. i know i wouldnt.

tysgrandma99	before you wake up next to him again.find out if hes a pathological liar....and then leave him.

CoolUserName7	Lying does warrant a divorce you need to leave his a. The next thing he is going to tell you is he was in prison or some crazy s* like that, do you really want to stick around to hear THAT? He misrepresented himself, that is grounds for an annulment.

jimrich	marriage counseling and self-esteem training for your self.

Ariel	girl , you married one person and he turned out to be some one else , meaning he is a stranger some one you just got to meet and dislike. leave him he doesnt deserve you. look this is a saying i strongly believe in..... when we came in the world we came alone and til dis day i breath walk think and feel alone and independently you dont need him you have all you need in your self sure in the future you will need love and will find it to some one who beomes truthful to you , girl leave then start skiping and then runnnnnnnnnnn and dont look back, the baby best way trough the courts to arrange visitations. good luck.

chikis	Did it ever occur to you that maybe you asked for too much and that that's why he had to make up a career and education that he never actually acquire. about the child that's a definitely divorce at least if you still have some pride.

Barbara M	i am divorcing my husband of 30 years....he lied about similar things and is making my life hell right now. my children are grown now, but they carry the scars. He was insecure and made up for it by putting us down. He believes his own lies. This lying can be a SERIOUS problem. It says a lot that he would mis-lead you , that is disrespectful and low down. Decide carefully. I am sure more untruthes will unfold now.

tainted.luv	well that is a screwed up situation but you are married now ..everyone has a past even YOU! I think you made a commitment to this guy for better or worse so maybe u should try to work it out ..I mean if he's not cheating then u should atleast try ?If you love him and he loves you then whats the problam ..are you happy in marriage now ?? or is this an easy out? you gotta be honest with urself what do u want ..do u want the commitment or not? its your choice ..noones perfect hun and if u didnt have such high standards then maybe he wouldnt have felt the need to lie about his education ?? he lied to impress you ?not that it is a good thing to do ..I dunno u better think about what u want before you leave..especially if theres a child invovled ..ppl make mistakes hun ..im not saying that what he done was right ..cuz its not but if your in love why turn your back on it ?? love is suppost to be understanding and forgiving ..im not trying to justify what hes done just follow your heart ..do what makes you happy ..

honest	If he fooled you then you must be educated beyond you intelligence. Next time marry for LOVE. It will solve a lot of issues.

?	Maybe he did not trust that you would repect him if he told you the truth. Men need respect as much as women need love. Would you have repected him if he told you he wasn't as educated as you? Is education and background all that matters? I hope not. Love and honor count for something. He needs to know you honor him for more than whats in his brain. If you're as smart as you claim, common sense would tell you Im right about this. He's afraid you will not respect him and without respect...a man has nothing to lose.

Mutchkin	I am wondering why he lied to you. Doesn't in any way justify the lie. However, it will give you a puzzle to figure out why and if it is able to be salvaged in the marriage. Whether he was trying to empress you to live up to your expectations. Or he was ashamed of his past and feared you would leave. Or he is living a double life. Have you tried marriage counseling? Even if decide to divorce, at least give it a shot.

Faith Nelisiwe N	divorce the man and move on with your life find some one who has your standard and some one who is trust worthy to be with you,he doesn't deserve to forgivine he is a cheat and a liar,an dhe will always lie to you,move on and raise the baby alone,a father is some one who can be trusted your child doesn't need some one like him,he is not a good mentor.

averilyn06	Is he a good provider, loving husband, and loving parent? does he respect you in each and every way. maybe he lied because he loved you and knew you were the one. he new he had no chance without lying to you. if you answer yes stay with him and get marriage counseling and counseling for yourself. But if you think that you have to LEAVE his lying behind, then kick him out or you leave. Since he is such a liar, investigate his whole background, try to get police reports or hire an private investigator. if you have time investigate yourself. also, be careful because leaving a lying man like that who may really love you, can really hurt you. I've seen an episode on A&E that describe your situation. A man lied about everything, he said he was a medical student and blah blah , but his wife found out that he was a fraud. when he was busted, he snapped and ... Miss be careful and God Bless.

KIKI	I have a question, besides the lies how is your marriage? I mean is he a good husand, do you have any reason to believe that his unfaithful? Don't get me wrong him not being truthful about his education and the other child are major issues. However, do you really want to end your marriage over them. I think you need to stop and really think this out I mean you have a child now and its not just about you and your husband anymore.

Crystal L â„¢	Bad Yellow ***** has it right on the nose. I agree completely. If he's going to lie to you about this stuff, what else is he going to lie to you about?

thevoicesjustgotlouder	honestly, did you love him before you knew about this? Just work things out, you have a child with the man. Think about the kid. You probably didn't tell him everything about yourself before you got married. anyway. i've never been married so i won't try to be the one to tell you anything. peace out and good luck

kel124	Follow your heart. It will tell you if you are ready to walk out of his life for good. Or if you are willing to forgive him.

E.M.	open up a can of whoop * on him he is a lieing *,,get rid of him kick him tio he curb....

Forlorn Hope	WELL, AREN'T YOU THE SHALLOW SPOILT BRAT!!!! He obviously shows he is well educated (maybe not in your terms) by having fooled you... You must have loved him for some reason other than his education, or are you that pathetic??? Love shouldn't need "education"... Okay, so he lied, big deal!!! He works, doesn't he?? Supports you and your child??? So he has another child, so what??? Maybe you should divorce him, he obviously doesn't deserve someone who is so shallow... And who obviously doesn't love or respect him enough to overlook some fairly minor transgressions...

Shaun	You should be understanding. Maybe he loved you and didn't want you to be limited to "highly educated" men. If he is TRULY sorry, work towards forgiveness. I'm sure you've sinned before, and what do you want God to do to you when he points out your sins? How is he supposed to forgive you if you can't forgive anybody else? Then again, if your husband might be dangerous or truly cannot be trusted, you should be careful...

Ms. Educated	I would let him go, YOUR HUSBAND IS A LIAR and he's going to stay one.

numba_1_babii	i think u should divorce him cause witout trust in a realtionship den wat his there?

Truth Hurts	Well you pretty much have your answer...Your entire relationship has been based on lies and to top it off, you found out thru someone else...not even from him...Of course he is going to ask for forgiveness. But that doesn't mean you have to forgive him. He isn't the person you thought he was and you are right, you won't be able to trust him. I say get rid of him and set up visitation for the baby you have in common.