Should my ex-husband's fiance invite HER parents to my son's 1st Communion?

Sherry F	Yes they are part of his extended family now Now he has 3 set of grand parents and two mommy's now. stop being so jealous

TRIXIE	tough spot to be in. my initial reaction was, "h*ll no", but then i thought well first communion, church and all and i then thought what would Jesus do..

CowGilr Kassie	Always keep the quit to keep the good peace u and yr ex r in, its better for yr child, plus if they got married they will be his brothers and sisters Grand Parents. _K_

Candy B	its weird that they would even want to attend but i guess they want to consider him as their grandson soon. king james bible--great for spiritual edification

Mike&Jenn Baby Noah is here!	I have to edit my response and agree with 'A Canadian'. You don't want to cause strife right from the beginning, do you?

Smoochy Poochy	They have probably developed a relationship with him in your absence so I say let them come, it won't hurt and shows they obviously care about your son and thats wonderful considering they are only his step-grand parents-to-be!

topside	Well how well does your son get along with these people, because want it or not they will be extended family once your ex remarries. They become his step-grand parents. If you really all do get along then this should not be a big deal.

pumpkin	if they get along.... they treat him well - I don't see the problem. It is his day, maybe you can ask him (you son). You husband is engaged to this is pretty serious and marriage is only piece of paper:D

AZ_FAN	yes, from what i know in the catholic religion family is important and everyone should go. dont get jealous, its not about you its about your son. what you and your ex had was in the past.

concerned1	Just keep the peace. In the end, just be glad he's marrying someone who's family accepts your child as their own. I know it's hard, but it's in the best interest of your child. Good Luck.

â˜¼ImmaStarâ˜¼	You can say something... but the day is for your son.. not for you... and not for your husband... your son is the one having his first communion... and if he is close with his step mom's family.. then yes they should be able to attend.

k.mon93	I don't think you should say anything unless it really bothers you. If you and your ex husband have a good relationship and don't want to make things awkward I think you should let it slide.

sparkwing_dimond	they should come. In a way they will be your sons grandparents too. H will be lucky enough to have 3 sets of grandparents. Eventually you will have to get used to them being invited to family events.

mrystry1	They will be his step-grandparents and a part of his life. Just like when you get re-married again if you haven't already, your new husbands parents will want to be involved in your sons life, and activities. It just what happens.

GuMdrOpS & LOLLiPoPs	It's important to your ex-husband and this is also his child. He consider's his fiance's parents family even if you don't. You're going to have to be open-minded about this.

Stupidity is NOT a handicap	tell her that no offense but she isn't his mother, and not yet the mother in law and stand your ground tell her you planned for a small event and arent sure you are comfortable with your parents talking with hers... not to mention, its just bad news.

i_ate_sponge_bob	If they are a big part of your sons life then there is no reason they shouldn't be invited. However if they don't see much of your son then it is a little weird and if you aren't comfortable with it then mention it to your ex.

lizzie r	i dont think they should be there, but if they are genuinely going to be in your son's life a lot then maybe it wouldnt be a bad thing to meet them. if they're not however, i think its ok for u to question why they will be at a special event like this

VoiceofCommonSenseâ„¢	If she was his wife, it would be one thing, but they are not even married. For now, I would give it a no. Once he is married to her, things can change. Many fiances become former fiances. Just because you're a finace, doesn't guarantee you'll be a wife. Put your foot down on this.

Seth. Snuggie Sutra with Me.	What exactly is wrong with a family who makes an effort to get along and be part of eachothers lives? Does it really matter if they aren't related yet? Communion is supposed to be a celebration so don't cause unnecessary drama, Seth.

Young Hagg	Voice your opinion, but if you create the conflict, someone is going to have to back down so things don't escalate. If he is adamant and doesn't back down, then you're going to need to. No reason creating a huge fuss about your own priorities when the focus should be on your kid.

astutewoman	If your son is close to them - invite them.. you will be the bigger person here.. If not - then no way... He is your son, not hers... this sets precedence for future celebrations! My ex is remarried, his wife has a huge family - that are very close to my kids.. BUT my kids get two celebrations for everything - so we do not have to deal with that stuff... think about it, the kids benefit and no new wifey and her family to sit around judging you as the mom...

Due w/baby # 2 on 3/2/10	If you did say something their both not going to be happy with it and itâ€™s only going to cause a problem between the 3 of you. But if I was I your place I would say something because I would see it the same way youâ€™re seeing itâ€¦their not married and they arenâ€™t your sonâ€™s grandparents until the day they say â€œI Doâ€ Good luck.

clio	Now if I were your shoes, I'd say nothing (because I'm feeble and want everyone to like me), but I'd fume about it the whole time, and always feel that the day wasn't everything it should have been. So I say to you: speak out. Stand up for what you want. Each time someone pushes you over, you become easier to pushover the next time. I know this from experience. I am working hard now not to be the yes-gal any more. You may not get your way, but at least you'll have made it harder for them to get theirs.

Rebecca W	I can't think of a better time for everyone to put their differences aside and include even the soon to be step-grandparents than First Communion. Your son is starting to walk forward in life in a religion that promotes love and forgiveness. I least that is what I thought christians were all about. If not, maybe the consecration to the church shouldn't take place.

Janet W	They are your sons soon to be step-grandparents and I think that you should welcome the notion that the more people that love your son the better his world will be. I understand your feelings too but you don't want them to treat your son like a step-grandson. It's good that they are willing and ready to become a part of his family. He will have the ties and they might as well be cordial.

basmusiq	I find it odd too. Even if you guys still get along, which is great by the way, it doesn't allow her to invade your party. To me it just sounds like she's trying to become a good step mom and let her parent as well as others that she really cares about your son. Still, even with her good intentions I don't think another set of "steps" should be there. She probably thinks it's her right to have her parents there since they will be his step grandparents.

lovepreschool	This day is about your son. Also, these people will be his stepgrandparents whether you like it or not. I think you need to all just attend the communion and forget the luncheon, unless only you, children, ex & his fiancee attend. In other words, no grandparents, aunts or uncles of any kind. This is going to be forever (or as long as ex is married). Your child is set to get a whole new set of relatives. Might as well get use to it.

Meg	Well, i think first you need to ask yourself why it bothers you. Is it because she is his fiance, or because you don't know her parents? I understand that they aren't his biological grandparents, however, being a step parent and the family of a step parent isn't an easy job. Once you figure out why it bugs you then try talking it over with your ex. You have managed to maintain a healthy relationship with him, so communicating with him shouldn't be too hard. Please keep in mind, that this is your son's big day. Ask him what he thinks as well. If you find that he doesn't care either way, then confront your feelings and figure out what is the best way to handle the situation from there.