Sister has secret about husband..?

lovenwar	TAKE CONTROL and be a GOOD MOM first to your kids!!! They need you. You can make it without this guy. Let your friends and co-workers know about his behavior. Tell them in person. Tell your doctor. Tell your neighbor. Tell your parents. Don't let Nancy Grace be looking for you. Go with your gut feeling. You are in DANGER. GET out or at least get your kids out. Get a backbone!!! You go girl...make a plan, call the local women's shelter for support. Empower!

ideally_rational	sounds like your husband made a pass at your sister at some point and she didn't tell you about it.

?	You need to leave him anyways so go ahead and find out what the secret is

maya	first all of find out his secret & then think about leaving

â™¥~â™¥devilwithbleudressâ™¥~â™¥	not knowin much of what goes on where the kids are concern, I would say you should leave him if he don't want to go into counseling for his alcohol/controlling issues/anger/and negativity. Are the kids happy when he's around. I feel for them if they're not and you see it and know it. As for the secret. Tell your sister to eat and swallow it and take it to her grave. You needn't hear any secrets she has kept from you. When she heard it the first time, and if she's your friend, she should've told you right then. Kick her on the butt..lol.

pegasis	Well, ask her what that secret is. Get to the bottom of it, to put your mind at rest. then decide what you want to do after you find out what your faced with.

Mike	Trust your instincts, they sound reasonable. In staying you are enabling his behavior. You also have the option of trying to help him, but you may have already gone down that road to no avail. No one deserves the life you're living and it sounds like you would be better off without him. As for the sister's secret, tell her to keep it, you don't need it. Good luck with whichever path you choose. But choose one and stick with it.

ronnieD	Secret or not, you do need to leave him. Why doesn't your sister just tell you. "I have a secret"...whatever...both of you need to grow up.

sonnyboy	Leave him and you know what...........you don't even need to know the secret!!! Your sister should keep what she knows to herself.It never pays to get involoved in other peoples problems.I think you've figured out all by yourself that you have to leave and if for nothing else,for your childrens sake.They have to be first in your life no matter what. Your sister cannot decide what you do with your life.or tell you what to do.She is also trying to control you. Make your own decision and then act on it.You're not weak and controlled.You're scared cause it's a big decision to have to make and one you don't take lightly. Be strong for you and your children and do what you think is right.You do not deserve to be abused and neither do they.You deserve much more. Good Luck and I'll say a prayer for all of you.

javelin	Only 6 years? Stick it out, he will change eventually. Maybe another 20 years or so. Heck, you found him, and there are only 3 BILLION other people on the planet, so you are lucky you found the one guy you can actually like. He'll come around.

wishingstar5555	First get yourself to a shelter for women somewhere in another town for protection . This guy just might go crazy on you ! I would suggest after you are safe then drop the bomb on him "the secret".

goldwing	It really doesn't matter what your sister has on him, does it? It is YOU that I am worried about. By your own admission, you are turning into someone you do not know. Leave now! This is just stupid and you know it. You need NOTHING more to leave...you already know you have to RUN. He is messing your kids minds up...get the hell out of there now. Thanks, I wish you love and peace in life, and the only way to find either is get rid of this monster.

tearsofthemoon00	This decision has to made by you without any game playing.See a Therapist,explore your options,you are a adult and its time to believe in yourself.

Hi its me again	I would not stay in this relationship if I were you. Think about your kids if anything else. He will rub off on them and they may turn into adults like him. You don't want that.! as for the secret.... he may have come onto her, who knows, but whatever it is, it's not good. Leave and don't answer the calls when he tries to woo you back by calling 100 times a day. Don't look back, for your kids!

mrsknowitall	It sounds all a bit childish to me secret or not it doesn't sound as if your heart is in it so stop with nonsense and leave him already. You and your kids deserve better.

Scott S	If you feel he isn't treating you right, wht do you think your answer is? Ive been married to my wife for 11 yrs. I don't ffel the need to control her or bury her with the problems of alcohol. He needs to realize who his Queen is, or hit the road & do whatever it is he wants to do to destroy his own life, not yours or your childrens. There are too many good men out there ready to treat you like you want to be treated. Forget about your sisters secret, I think you already know What you need to do!! Good luck

kissybertha	find out the secret but remember don't shoot the messenger!

EndlessLover	Your story is one that is all to common these days. #1- You have two boys and they come first. NO DISCUSSION #2 - You home life is not stable. (see #1) #3 - Your sister has a secret? That frightens me and should be worried about her and your husband. If she were certain about the secret's truth, she should have told you already. OR the secret involves her and that's just wrong in and of itself. #4 - You should hear what she has to say, but regardless you should definitely end this relationship. Period (see #1) #5 - You're too young and have too much life yet to live and you're too old to waste any more time with this j***a55.

Just Life, Trying To Live It.	I think your sister slept with him. Would that do it for you?

wrongedincali	Don't ask any Questions you don't want to know the answer to period! If your going to leave leave you don't need more ammunition

shortcakestraberry	LEAVE HIM NOW! go while he is sleeping i sware to god to leave while he is sleeping u dont want to become the weak wife he wants u to be dont even think about leaving while he is around u trust me if he has drinking problems and stuff like that he will beat u if u leave while he is around u need majour help! this will make a bad inpresion on ur kidz leave while ur kidz r young tell them wat happend when they r say 16 maybe? but leave to some where where he will not expect because he will look for u!

John Timothy	Ask what the secret is. Either way, you are going to want to know.

LoveWithNoBoundaries	It sounds like you know what you need to do, in your heart. Just remember that he is helping to shape the kind of men oyur boys will grow up to be. It may be better to raise them alone then in a relationship that they think this kind of treatment is the norm. The way they see him treat you and them is how they will learn to treat the women and children in their lives. Leaving him shouldn't depend on this secret, it should depend on what is happening now. What I wouldn't want to see happen is for him to turn you against your sister after you confront him about the secret. If you leave him, you'll need to have your sister for support. Best wishes.

Mastershake	Leave the man. And if your sister can't tell you what she knows about your husband, then it must not be that good a secret anyway. Why can't she tell you now? Maybe she slept with him and will only tell you when your not with him anymore so that she can't be classified as the homewrecker. Anywho-I'm not dissing your sister. You need to get out of the relationship anyway. You already know that the negativity is bad for the boys, and it's bad for you. Don't let this man control you. Your better than that.

Zeera	You'll never be the woman he paints you to be. You're you, with a good head on your shoulders and great devotion to your sons. Find out the secret; why should she keep information to herself which belongs to you?

Dr.D	Nothing will change unless YOU change it! ;-)

Sergio S	damn, but you can't let him do and say whatever he wants... I say you leave him

mickey n	get out! What is your deal? Think of your boys.

jaded	yikes! dont forget to repost and let all of us know what the secret is!!!

la buena bruja	If you don't care enough about yourself, think about your children. Don't subject them to this abuse.