i really want to have an affair?

oracleofohio	Why don't you just try leaving. Then you can live as you wish and not add another "wrong" to the entire situation. Your reasoning is really off.

UTESROX	dont do it just ask foe a divorce

Derek B	Well I can understand where you're coming from. Shoot me an email, we can talk.

d b	leave- if you have tried everything dont lose face by being wrong too - go out of the marriage with your head held high knowing that you were faithful to your marriage and you tried everything in your power to make it last - dont let him win by pushing you to someone else and giving him something to go to his fam and friends with thats negative - always be the good guy!! trust sister - been there, done that, wrote a book and have a keychain - i didnt give in and no one blames me for what happened in our marriage

â˜…Aâ„“â„“â„“â„“y Ð²Î±Ð¸gÑ•â˜®	divorce!? then if you're single at least, you won't be actually "having an affair" i guesss??????? idk

keithleyjustin	if my wife told me she wanted an affair i wounldnt talk to her either ever until she decided to leave then i would move on with life. Maybe you nag all the time !! maybe you just need to give it time, devine answers dont come when we maybe think they should. The devine wouldnt tell you to have an affair. Think you need to let this hurt man go,when you told him that--that would have crushed him into ps's even if he didnt say anything,i wouldnt either.........

c	well you may as well have an open relationship (weak!) since you're not strong enough to leave and be on your own

Devan the G	well.. after all that. just go have an affair and feel better. then come back and keep tryin with him but there is a time where enough is enough tryin for him

gaby_villanueva	well if you love him....ask him if he loves you and he he says no then divorce and if he says yes try talking yo him

Pi$$ed off Pu$$y	i am married and i know that i will not always be faithful. it's stupid to think you will. go f*ck someone. it will add excitement and some self esteem to help you stand up to him.

Sondra D	If you have an affair, will it help your relationship? Will your husband communicate with you better?

connie d	Answer: As the moon wanes and appears , so is the woman's emotions and passions. We liked to be caressed and be sought after, to receive a phone call, to receive love letters and flowers. Don't be disappointed if we hoped too much and did not receive the love back. Keep loving. Hate is temporary if our love is powerful and we know how to forgive and understand the other person. It is called unconditional acceptance or unconditional love. Love prevails but how long your patience can endure some mishaps, time will tell. Know what you want and say Goodbye if it hurts since your happiness is very important. We sought relationships to be happy and when we are not, he is not the ONE. It is always risky to fall in love but I will always take the risk. Yes, I will have an affair to find satisfaction but will file for divorce at the same time. Written by Connie ; motherhealth@gmail.com

cynthia	do it. it will put things in perspective. a real eye-opener.

Ali	don't have an affair... you'll probably regret it. why don't you seperate for a while?

â™¥Nubianâ™¥	I know as a woman how it feels to be cheated on. That is something you will never â€œget overâ€. Trust me you will feel better in time. If you cannot forgive him and you feel as if you need to cheat, not just for revenge but to make yourself feel better, than I hate to say itâ€¦â€¦. maybe you should. Everyone says leave but who knows ones particular situation. Maybe you will be living in a standard less than you are accustomed to. Possibly, you do not have a carâ€¦..who knows what the situation is. Just like they say for womenâ€¦..â€Itâ€™s cheaper to keep HIM,â€ I say if you do cheat be careful to take care of yourself. Wear protection, first dates should be in a public place. I wish you the best! When this happened to me these are a few tricks that helped me get back on track. Flirt with the cute young guy at the bookstore or grocery store. Get your hair and nails done. Treat yourself to a pedicure. Lunch with girlfriends. Overnight Weekend with the kids only. Remember how you felt about yourself before you met â€œhimâ€ (your husband). GIRL YOU ARE FABULOUS---DO NOT LET ANYONE MAKE YOU FEEL ANY DIFFERENT.

BabeHart	If you are so miserable, and have tried every avenue with no success, then why not just go your separate ways? Why would ANYONE risk such bad karma and make themselves into such an ugly person (by cheating) when they can divorce and be free to play with whomever they desire? Do yourself a favor, get out of that situation. It's not worth the repercussions if you cheat...what goes around, comes around.

Mean Carleen	You have all the answers and must know you make no sense. You want an affair - there basically is no relationship, he cheated and all your efforts have failed and you dont want a divorce? You need to have your head examined.

cop350zx	The best way for us to avoid this situation is to ask God who he has for us BEFORE we marry, and then wait. Easier said than done.

scoobydoo316316	If your relationship with your husband doesn't seem to get better, then why don't you just get divorced? He's broken your trust. He doesn't seem too concerned with your relationship. What is it that is making you stay? This "husband" of yours is not a husband. You need to start believing in yourself and get divorced from this bum and find someone who will take care of you the right way. There's no need to stay in this relationship.

brittanykoren86	leave, dont cheat. you dont need more problems. just leave

Keith Python	You don't need an affair; you need marriage counselling.

thydarknight	if you lost hope and your unhappy then you should leave not have a affair. you know that two wrongs don't make a right. why stay in a marriage when there is nothing left between the two of you. things are going to get better if you already tried everything. it sounds like it's already over between the two of you. an affair is not going to help the marriage at all. you shouldn't stay if you are unhappy. this had happen to me I was unhappy in my marriage and I left my husband but I never divorced him though. we both moved on with our lives we both even met other people and everything else but 7 years later we got back together because we both know that we were unhappy in our marriage and now we are working on our marriage and things are going better between the two of us. but I didn't stay because I wasn't happy. how can you make someone else happy if your not happy yourself. you need to think about your needs and what makes you happy. if you have children then you also need to think about them too. but if you want someone to talk to or even communicate with then make some friends and get out and do things without him. just don't have an affair because you are thinking about it or because you have threaten him with having an affair on him because that's not going to solve anything and some times it makes things worse. you need to do what you think is right for you. good luck.

carolina b	at this point in your relationship I dont think he's going to care wether you have an affair or not.so your just better off leaving him.or maybe when he figures out that you are having an affair that will be his ticket to get out of the relationship

Lafiite	Take the high road.... stay or get out. An affair is not a solution, just another issue that will cause more problems. If the threat of an affair isn't a motivating factor, then a real affair won't be either. Unless the idea is to motivate him to leave. If that's the case then get out now, before you add the additional anger/distrust/hurt/betrayal that an affair brings. I have been on both sides of the coin, and an affair isn't good either way. Even if you are doing the cheating, you end up blaming your spouse for the way you feel afterwards (guilty, embarrassed, and eventually worthless). An affair IS NOT the easy way out. It's the harder, more painful, less healthy road. I wish I had better advice, like "go for it, he deserves it" or "do what makes you happy" but the fact of the matter is, because of human nature and our deeply held ideas about faithfulness and love, affairs just don't make us happy... they just let us forget how unhappy we are for a short time, until they poison themselves and eventually destroy the relationship you were escaping from in the first place.

bob g	same boat email me for how i handled it

@@@@	If you do, make sure its for the right reasons.

Mergler	If you want to have an affair well you dont have to go too far to look...theres a ton of dudes on here with your problem. Take comfort in knowing that you are not alone here.. just know that an affair will not fix your marital problems. It will give you some much needed relief but thats about it. Other things you may get is feelings for another or glup! some STD...which you most likely wont anticipate. you say you tried everything...did you try a separation? Sometimes living apart for awhile makes you both realize what you had....or what you dont have.. You said your husband cheated on you...you want to do the same?

Get Even Steven	I think if it's in the cards to have an affair, then do it. I know out of the real hurt you have over your husband doing the same, it will bring you back to square one. He has lost complete interest in you, sorry to say...some people cheat for the excitement of it and feel guilty afterwards. I think in your case, the cheating will not make you feel any better as you still love your husband. I think you will feel guilty as well. Good Luck with this situation..write to me as I have been down this road as well.

John Timothy	Have an affair then. But wouldn't the decent thing be to separate from your husband first?