why do women stay with abusers?

maggielynn	There are a lot of reasons people who are abused stay with the abuser. I used to work in a women's shelter and a lot of the time it's because of money- their partner has all of it and if they leave, they won't have anywhere to go. The national domestic violence hotline - http://www.ndvh.org will offer help to anyone who is in this bad situation.

Dolphin lover	Because Men and Women that are in abusive situations generally have way low self esteem and think they deserve it for some reason, or can do no better. They were also probably raised with some sort of abuse in their family and therefor, also don't know that LOVE SHOULDN'T HURT! If you are concerned for a friend, contact your local abuse shelter and get some information for them. Also, tell them that they are worth more than that and, again, "LOVE SHOULDN'T HURT".

i<3drewce	because we're dumb and in love

John D	It seems to be low self esteem, they do not think highly of themselves or feel they deserve to be treated better. The best thing is for a woman to get away from the situation, go to a battered woman's shelter if necessary.

Gucci Girl	because that loser made them feel like they can't get any better than what they have. So this individual feels worthless and weak just like the abuser wanted them to feel.

shazbotbaru	when you marry someone it's for life....even with abuse, there's always the chance that the abuser will change....and Love has no limits....

bad mo-fo	women go back because they are lacking spiritual fitness, carry financial insecurities and because they are just as sick as the abuser. There are Abused Women's services in many places..look in the front of the phone book and you should find some referrals. She can get better...and she will. Help her to see she is worth saving.

Evoljz_Girl	They keep going back because they keep telling themselves that things will get better. Abuse doesn't typically happen on a daily basis. Sometimes there are a lot of good days and just a few bad days so they just wait for the bad day to blow over. It just becomes an ongoing cycle. There are plenty of women shelters and support groups - some women just don't feel like they have the time or resources to leave.

_heartbreak	because they think they're in love, and they are insecure. they feel like they deserve to be abused. and NOBODY deserves that. to get help, tell someone, anyone...hopefully you'll choose the police. good luck!!! I really hope it turns out okay.

quinton s	because they are scared to do anything about becaus the abuser my hurt them.

while_love_remains	Sometimes it is because of dependency issues. Try a women's shelter. They are kept very secret to ensure the men don't find a woman who has gone there for help. Also try counseling. It really can help!

132	The men destroy thier confidence and make them believe noone else would want them, also the woman are scared of what their husbands will do if they decide to leave.

bestgurl	I think it's mostly because they think that that's the only man they'll ever get. They can find help. There's special places, but I don't know them right off the top of my head.

Snowflake	There are centers to support victims of domestic violence all over US. They provide with support and shelter.One can reach them thorugh local police (just call a non-emergency number and describe the situation) or through yellow pages. Also, a regular therapis is a good source. They stay with abusers because their self-esteem is very very low. Because abusers lead them to believe that this is the best that they can get out of life. She usually never knows what reaction her action will cause. Will he like her cooking or will he spit in it? Will he explode with anger if she wants to spend some time with her friends at the mall or will he say "OK, see you couple hours later." If you had a dog and every time you extend you hand to the dog's face the dog would never know what is your intention - are you going to hit it or you're going to pet it, you'd end up with an abused animal, very unstable and scared, but not even thinking about runnig away. However, if you are consistent about beating the dog - the dog will run away for sure. Same with humans. If he beats her up consistently - she would have run for her life long time ago. If he beats her up every now and then - she will stay thinking that this is what she deserves, he will change, she will learn to understand him better, while the truth is - she should run.

love_n_hate84	Because they think that " love conquers all" and that broken noses will mend.

xckid62	'cause alot of the other guys are probably boring to them. The "abusers" are probably better in bed

FaZizzle	The Stockholm syndrome takes effect. You begin to believe what he says. Most abusers make it clear that without him, you would be nothing. They also apologize at some point, even after breaking his wife's nose.

?	Afraid the abuses would get them if they try to leave. Some have no choice. For the sake of the kids.

.:.:.Mizz_undaStood.:.:.	because some are afraid of divorce.

BubbyWubby	Because they're scared to be by themselves a lot of the times and most have low self esteem problems.

Kelly T	i have often heard because they like the attention even if it is bad.

TroubleRose	because they are attached and feel that there is no where else they can go. They are trapped...they need to find a womens shelter for domestic abuse. There is one in every state

Green1808	Fear.

NICOLE	the men probably threaten them to stay with them. cuz they can't get anyone else

SBad	Some think they can't divorce for the sake of their lives! Try Maury.

Prett1	to tell you the true, cuz we are stupid we love them and we keep thinking that theyr going to change

hotbutter	low self esteem

madtyga2002	b/c they think its love

rachel	ignorance